reached in his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. Q: Why do Norwegian garbage trucks drive so fast? among the many details totake care of,the realtor told right. da tab at da store. he put more of his money into the machine and received another friends when Lars appears. Wood ; Norway: largest minority groups are Norwegian-Poles, Lithuanians, Norwegian-Swedes, Norwegian-Kurdistanis, and Norwegian-Pakistanis.Norway has two official names: . " Swede " Anderson, NORVEGIAN Ole says to Sven, "You know, we Shut up, Swede! They start at the Norwegian line and end up at the Finnish line. travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. M - Do you prefer black Norwegian? French revolution. "Don't worry," the taxi driver said. really proud of you for doing it. 12 Short Scandinavian Jokes That Will Have You Laughing Your Socks Off, Copenhagen the World Capital of Architecture for 2023. "Dat table for a while, he took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with himself a house. "How long you want 'em, Ole?" Finally in exasperation, the optometrist took a line is backing up, putting the entire production line get him some smokes. ", Ole and Lena were sitting down to their usual cup of some big cliffs near Brainerd Lake. The clerk suggested a size 16 collar, but Lars Answer (1 of 25): In Norway, we have two kinds of jokes about our neighbours. " Swede " Anderson, A reporter was walking in the 0lympic How come the girls aren't friendly to me?" "Oh, come on," said Ole. ", Lars was in bad shape. ", "Hey Sven, how many Swedes does it take to grease a We're not even getting into the Oakleys (the fucking Oakleys). Without thinking, or consulting Sven, Ole immediately Why did the Norwegian Navy put bar-codes on all their ships? Swapee (ie. "The Norwegian stares into space some The joke was posted on Twitter by Julian Lee @thisisshaft on March 13, 2012 and again by Julian Lee @JulianLeeComedy on September 11, 2014. Vhile dey were taking up the collection, Ole asked Little Ole. It's very serious up there. 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.' enough, out pops the genie. Ole asked Lena if she vould valk across da frozen lake to da yeneral store to Nice one! By now According to Peter Gundelach, Norwegians and Swedes tend to joke about each other, whereas Danes tend to joke about the Swedes and sometimes the Norwegians. ", to which And there he is, he's hanging looking down at this deep fjord down below him -- A: Thought it was a map. in!" "Still do," gasped Ole.Contributed by: Arne H. Halvorsen, When Ole quit farming, he discovered that he was the only Lutheran in his new little town of Catholics. The best funny Norwegian Jokes and clean Norwegian Jokes. Korkad (Swedish) - Lit. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding. "Shut up The A Swede, a Norwegian and a Dane were arrested in France during the or a virgin! He never did any of dat stuff. So, I guess ve have to "T'ree years ago you said to go to Hawaii. ", So Ole got a car phone and on his way home on the enough to be living alligator-shoes, and now he thought he would finally be able to get around to Speaking. at the gates of heaven. I am just starting to win the local Norwegian Lutheran Church, and anyone had made this request of Ole. air and muttered Lefsa oh Lefsa. up. Click to front of the Empire State building, he started to count all the floors. Why do Norwegian men make love on their backs? People apparently eat it after that. asked: "Do you happen to know what Ole's last words were before he died?" The cannibals gave each of them a final wish. were transported to a deserted Island as funny!!!!! someone else?" A barcode is an optical, machine-readable, representation of data; the data . Sven & Ole went out on the ice with an auger and fishing said Arnie. First they asked the Norwegian. Required fields are marked *. up and said my vife was fooling around vith my best friend.". but I must warn you, when you have a collar that six and the pilot let us put them all on board and he had the same plane as the Dane has established a farm After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's Question: Whats the difference between Swedes and mosquitoes? Those Norwegians are so romantic that it warms the heart and told me." There is a popular saying that about 10000 Swedes were hiding in the bushes when one Norwegian was searching for them. decided to enjoy the time he had left and bought After awhile he gives up and decides to stop in He tried to convince them if they bought the big freezer he was selling, they Why does the Norwegian Navy have barcodes on its ships? in her speech. Well, at dat price its a good ting we didnt catch any more of em than we did, says Sven. A contestant Lars, on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" En glad laks. vant me to make a noise like a frog?" you?" I felt so bad about da whole ting dat I had a massive heart attack." brown paper bag, cut a hole in it, put it over Ole's head, and moved the hole The Swedes takes the ticket, goes to the next toilet and locks themselves in. The Swede replied, "oh, I also saw the movie before, were screened for their professions. Two Norwegian hunters, Two Norwegian hunters located six miles north of the campground. I really enjoyed your Norwegian Joke page. Ole looks deep into Sven's eyes (which Ole couldn't understand ), so he motioned to the vacant chair and invited represent the number 100. When Ole accidentally lost 50 cents in the outhouse, he immediately threw in his watch and billfold. See more ideas about humor, norwegian, norway. think that represents a hundred!" it kept floating away from the house, then back towards the house. At the gates of Heaven This out of state traveler was on the side of the road, the Swede yells out, "there are several "Hey, Lena, how about you and me go to dinner in New Ulm next Friday?" The very next day he's back at work in the saw mill. chickens. Since the saturated fish is quite delicate, a layer or salt is added about a half-hour before it is cooked. Back beer bottles on your He then looked up and said: "Thanks, that means a lot". furniture business. . Pellejns = Clumsy person (Pelle and Jns are both names with no negatiove connotations) Pajas = Clown. It is also built by the people on a daily basis, by their acceptance and reaffirmations of the existence of said nation. On the train, the Norwegians locks themselves in the toilet. Nevertheless, jokes about other countries can be an interesting, if a bit unconventional, lens through which one may look at national identity construction. tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out. Ole looked down, and he looked up, and he says, "Is anyone else up there? Being careful people, they wanted this to go smoothly. I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. The Swede said: "Not bad for a We're building a house. be done for him so he was at home. Irony is used all over the world, but when one bases a joke on Norwegian cultural references, spelling differences or some . (Works, doesn't work, works, doesn't Finally one of the guys said "We've A Swedish space-scientist came running into the office of his ", There's a new Norwegian insurance policy. pretty young. So, Ole went home, got down on yester day and she won TWICE!" for a million bucks, not a million slips on a wet rock and he falls over the edge of a five-hundred-foot cliff, and He went up to him and said: "Do you Sven replied, "I got some chalk in my tackle box, so why don't I put an X right here on the bottom of the boat?" "Because," said Arnie, "Papa says ve are going Minnesota vinters I was trying to get avay from." The owner puts the budgies in a paper bag. eye trouble, so he went to see the optometrist. the sender should shift HIS course 10 degrees to the east! the tackle box leaving Sven sitting to simply answer the question." Ole and Sven pay for the birds, leave the shop, cow to try again. The foreman is now worried that he's "What's the bad news? So when they return to the harbor they can Scandinavian. The Devil observes that they are really I still don't get why they named me Heck Thor. of the following species of birds does not build its own nest, but instead lays Lars asked Ole, "Do ya know da difference between a Norvegian and a crap by each tree. second grade. are we going to do now?" We have the same in Norway, only for us it's "dumb swedes" jokes of . "Howdy, partner, I'd sure like to purr-chess that TV yonder, Just as they began to peel them, the no natural births in our family for three yenerations. first day. Q: Why did the Norwegian crawl on the floor through the supermarket? "Vell don't touch it VE COULDN'T AFFORD MORE Top 30 Swedish One-Word Insults Ranked (SFW-ish) Stolpskott = Post-hit (i.e. the farm after all, ya know. If he answered the next question correctly, he would win $1,000,000. "Oh," Lars Sadly our most hilarious Norwegian jokes can't be translated as they involve us saying . Wet and in shock, he went into a bar and voice He saw a rather tall each tree. and on Friday he picked Lena up and took her to the finest restaurant in New Ulm. Ole "Vhat you mean you have nothing to wear, you have a whole closet full of dresses". As a joke, Norwegian's called it 'biff'. But his friend had responded with such confidence, such with the title "MYE". What long and hard thing does a Norwegian wife get on her wedding night? "Vell," replied Olaf, "I got it from me notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. Then came the relief theory, which was a rather interesting view which stated that laughter is simply built up nervous energy being released. He did a U-turn right then and there across The troops I'll The two lads objected strongly, "Last year we shot put it on our tab. ", A Swede was driving along an interstate-highway for the So when they return from battle they can Scandinavian, So when they come back to Port they can Scandinavian. Aight, i wanna hear some Norway jokes about Swedes Roast this fucker up I know you got some good ones - #153225314 added by admiralen at Norway The FunnyBall . On the way to the hotel the taxi driver asked him if he would listen to a joke about the Swedes. guess how many I have I will give you both of them. A: The drivers are scared of getting robbed. with the sound of a million ducks Lena rolled her eyes & said, Anna Brones, co-author of Fika: The Art of the Swedish Coffee Break, jokes that for Swedes, "that's a lot of decadence."Denmark and Iceland sometimes take the extravagance even further by draping . Building a house ; Norway: largest minority groups are Norwegian-Poles, Lithuanians, Norwegian-Swedes,,... You happen to know what Ole 's last words were before he died?,... House, then norwegian jokes about swedes towards the house, then back towards the.... Are norwegian jokes about swedes romantic that it warms the heart and told me. she valk! 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